Gone are the days when it’s only the guys that crushes on ladies. These days, ladies also crush on guys. The only difference is that a lady, who is crushing on a guy, could stay crushing for years without making a move. Some will try for months to get the guy’s attention using different methods.
A guy, on the other hand, could make a move on a lady just few weeks of crushing on her.
It is therefore essential that a guy makes a move on a lady when he notices that she’s crushing on him. Crushing on the opposite s*x isn’t a crime. In fact, it begins from admiring someone’s physique, complexion, friendliness, caring lifestyle, handsomeness, beauty, dentition, endowment, etc.
The crime is when you spend your entire time crushing without having the boldness to make a move.
You can always seize the opportunity to make a move on your crush when you feel you’re really getting to love the person. In the same vein, you might notice that an opposite sex is always looking at you, checking on you, calling you, gushing over you, buying you gifts and what have you. All these are signs that the person is having a crush on you. After some times, if you notice the person is not bold enough to make a move on you, all you need to do is to remain more free and accommodating around the person.
The reason why someone who is crushing on you, might delay in making a move on you, might be as a result of you not being free with them. So, they might feel ashamed if they are eventually turned down. So they prefer to remain in the crushing circle.
Here are sure ways to know someone is crushing on you:
* They checkup on you always: You notice a person checks you up always, a day can’t pass without him or her saying hello to you, either via call or text messages. This kind of person is a potential crush. If you think you like the person also, try to always reciprocate on days the person doesn’t call or text. This way, you’ll keep the crushing alive but if you don’t return phone calls or text or you ignore his or her call, you will only end up chase away a potential partner.
* They borrow something from you: Sometimes a crush who you just met might want to strike continual communication, and might just look for something to borrow from you as an excuse to see you again. As a student in a lecture room, you might sit next to someone who has a crush on you, and after the lecture, the person will want to borrow your lecture note, just as a way of seeing you again. This happened to me personally in church.
* They comment on all your social media posts: A crush might feel the best way to get your attention is by always commenting on your posts on social media, especially photos you post. Some will deliberately tell you they will use the photos as their wallpaper or save it on their phone. When you notice that someone is always commenting on every post you make, it is a sign someone is loving you secretly.
* They pay attention when you talk: You might have noticed how a particular person pays attention to you when you guys are having a conversation. Even when they have their phones with them, and someone is even trying to chat them up they rather pay full attention to you.
* They spend longer hours with you: They don’t rush to leave when they visit, they wish like staying with you for longer hours. Not because of your money but they just feel so relax while with you. This is because they’ll start missing you the very moment they leave your house.
* They make you notice their presence: This happens all the time. They sight you and immediately start trying to get your attention either by walking in front of you or coming to you to ask a question they probably know. Sometimes on a bus, a lady who admires a guy sitting next to her, might want to strike a conversation by asking where a particular bus-stop is or how much the transport fare is. It may also happen in places like church, school, workplace where you’ll notice someone who is continuously starring at you, this is just a way to get your attention.
* They feel shy when with you: It has been proven that someone who are really crushing on you might eventually get shy when they get to meet you. They feel nervous and might try to hide their feelings.
* They buy you gifts: They see buying you things as a way of getting to you, they pay for stuffs you buy even without your knowledge.
17 Ways to Handle Emotional Pains
Sadness is a natural emotion that is associated with loss and disappointment. However, if it doesn’t fade with time, it might point to a treatable condition, depression, that can impact your whole body and daily life.
1. Look for support. Whether you’ve already left your abuser, are still with your abuser or were abused long ago, consider reaching out to a trained domestic violence advocate at any point to find nonjudgmental support for how you’re feeling and what you’re going through. Processing your emotions can help you through the healing process.
2. Understand that recovery happens in stages. You’ll face anger, depression, bargaining and all of the stages of grief. When you start to forgive yourself and allow yourself to accept that the past is over, you can grow and build resiliency.
3. Don’t torture yourself by fixating on what caused the pain you’re suffering from. What has happened has already been done and cannot be undone.
If nothing can be done, your only and best choice is to simply to accept it and move on.
4. Open yourself to others, let them in. Does it hurt you to see your loved ones suffering? The same goes for your loved ones when they see you suffering.
Don’t lock yourself up in your room and avoid others. Let them in, it benefits both them and you. Humans are social creatures, isolating yourself ends up exacerbating your pain. Connection is the antidote.
5. See a therapist or counselor, who can help you uncover and deal with the emotions underlying your addiction.
6. Distract Yourself. Common belief used to bethat if we didn’t express every emotion we felt (or at least the big ones), they would show themselves in other ways. In some ways, this is true: there are benefits to examining our emotional states to learn from what our emotions are trying to tell us, and ‘stuffing our emotions’ in unhealthy ways can bring other problems. However, it’s also been discovered that distracting oneself from emotional pain with emotionally healthy alternatives such as a feel-good movie, fun activities with friends, or a satisfying mental challenge can lessen emotional pain and help us feel better.
7. Practice Meditation. Meditation is very helpful for dealing with a variety of stressors, and emotional stress is definitely in the category of stressors that meditation helps with. It allows you to take a break from rumination by actively redirecting your thoughts, and provides practice in choosing thoughts, which can help eliminate some emotional stress in the long term. Try a few meditation techniques.
8. Understand that Every emotion is temporary. Any emotion known to man is a fleeting, impermanent state (even the happy ones). Think of them like waves. Sometimes you can see it coming, other times it catches you by surprise. Some waves are bigger than others; however, by their nature they come and go.
9. Learn to smile and laugh, Laughter is important. I often distracted myself from negative thoughts and memories with humor. Watch a funny clip on the Internet or call a friend that always makes you laugh. In a time crunch, you can simply think of something that always helps you laugh or smile.
10. Apologize to others and to yourself, accept that what has happened has happened, and convince yourself that the only way to move forward is to forgive yourself.
11. Think about your own role in the situation that is upsetting you and look for ways in which you can improve. Most of the time, when we become angry at someone else, we finger point and look to blame. We may focus on the ways in which the other person has hurt us or what they have done wrong. It can be important to express how we have been wronged and discuss that with the person who wronged us, but it is also helpful to look at ways in which we could have handled things differently, what we can change about our own behavior or how we can approach a situation differently in the future.
12. Text a friend.
13. Ask someone to just sit with you.
14. Call a family member.
15. Talk to an adult you trust.
16. Call a friend you.
17. Listen to music, a podcast, or an audiobook.
Important things every woman want a man they love to understand about love and money.
Most women are always embarrassed to ask their man for money or for something they need, always embarrassed. They would rather soak up their challenges secretly or look for help elsewhere than going to him to ask for some help, even when she knows that he has the capacity to handle it, they don’t just feel right about it, especially for women with an independently ‘I should take care of myself’ mentality.
And the problem is not a lack of courage or pride, the challenge is that they feel responsible for themselves, and more than anything else they hate that you might feel buggy.
The closest thing they try to do is get help somewhere else, even when those alternative sources are the most unlikely to be responsive she will still prefer to take that chance than ask you for anything.
She expects you to figure out that something is not right. She just expects you to read her body language and her moods. She expects you to read the words in her silence but when you ask her ‘how are you?’ The next thing that follows is ‘have you eaten?’, and that’s all, you don’t go beyond that point.
Get this guys, as a man there is just no way you can be comfortable that your partner is not asking you for anything, there is just no way you can be at peace with yourself, it should itch your soul.
You are working and earning a salary but for 3 months you have not bought her anything, it’s bad honestly, even if your budget is tight, even if you are saving to buy world bank, 2months is enough to stop by the store and get her a nice pair of jeans or some tops, a fancy hair ribbon won’t put your savings in recession, it just the little things we do.
Most of us are just relaxed over the fact that she works and can take care of herself, yes she can, but even as the director of central bank she is also a woman, and as a woman she has needs that only a man can satisfy.
Dont wait for her to come asking you for little things, just as grown women always feel embarrassed to ask, grown men also feel embarrassed when their woman come asking for money and some common things they need, they just use their common sense to know that he is responsible for someone according to his capacity. Grown men ask what she needs, they don’t wait to be asked.
If this is you uncle please start using your common sense, start by showing concern with questions like;
“Baby, I have a free budget for April, is there anything you need that you want me to make a budget for?”
“Love, i know you need money for your project, I will cover your tithe for this month so you can add that 10% to what you have saved up, alright?”
“Bae, I told your friend that makes female shoes to make one for you, I paid already, just let her the design you like.”
Or sometimes just send her some cash and ask her to keep it for you, we both know she understands what you’re trying to do.
These little things are the foundation blocks of a relationship and marriage. Most brothers don’t even have the account details of their partner and they have been doing relationship for over a year. Some cannot remember the last time they bought airtime credit for their partner, it’s that bad. Love is not free, the price is responsibility.
Love and money have a connection, once one is not there, then there is a possibility of challenges in your relationship.
14 Ways to show a Man that you Love Him without saying ” I Love You ”
The happiest relationships come when two people are able to be open and honest with each other, and that honesty is a byproduct of being able to speak freely without fear of being judged.
1. If you want to show your guy that you think he’s special, you could just tell him you love him. He’ll always want to hear that. And, of course, you can surprise him with the latest iPhone or that golf club he’s been begging for. But probably the best way to make a man feel loved is to offer some simple, everyday acts of kindness that show him you understand him.
These little gifts will give something back to you: a marriage infused with more trust and friendship and a deeper sense of togetherness.
So go ahead and buy him things if you feel like it. But if you want to make him so happy leave those materials things or don’t focus on gifts.
2. Give him some “Guy Time” You are your husband’s best friend, as he’s likely to profess after a couple of beers. But sometimes he wants to go out with someone who won’t roll her eyes when he turns into a human whoopee cushion. That “someone” is… The Guys. “Men get energy from being away,” “They hang loose, talk or not talk. It gives them great intimacy without tremendous demands.”
3. Whether it’s running errands for him, getting chores done around the house, or quickly dropping off lunch for him during a busy day at work, small and large favors can take a huge weight off someone’s shoulders. By going out of your way to make your guy’s life a bit less stressful, you’re showing him that you’re willing to sacrifice your own time and energy to make him happy. If that isn’t love, what is?
4. Sometimes, the most loving moments come during the most difficult times. Just being there for your partner when he needs you the most can show him how much you really care about him, especially if he feels like he needs to put on a brave face for everyone else. Let him cry into your arms if he’s facing an overwhelming or tragic time in his life or bring him a cold washcloth and medicine if he’s sick in bed. Your support will mean just as much as three little words.
5. to be the pursuer in dating and relationships and feel that we need to ‘win’ a woman’s attention and attraction from our competition. Regardless of how silly this may sound to women reading this, my money is on the fact that many men are nodding along with it in understanding.
For this reason, we find we are often on the giving end of compliments, especially when it comes to someone we truly care about. Regardless of how confident a man comes across, acknowledging him with genuine adoration will make him feel appreciated, and all warm and fuzzy inside.
6. Give him long hugs. Men often communicate physically. Whether it be through body language, putting his arm around you, or how he tends to stand up taller when other men are around – it is a language he instinctively understands. This provides women with a great opportunity to be close to him physically and also send a very important message of love that he wants to hear [feel]. Holding on to him just a little longer or hugging him just a little tighter will show him the affection he desires.
7. Show Affection in Public. We’re not talking about over the top displays of affection here, a nice little hand squeeze or a peck on the cheek is all you need to show your partner, you care without making the people around you uncomfortable.
8. Brag on him. Tell family and friends maybe even complete strangers, how much you appreciate the man that he is. Preferably within his hearing.
9. Being close physically. Men often express themselves physically. Someone who is always close to you is taking comfort in the knowledge that you are with him.
Men also like the feeling of protectiveness that comes from being close to you. He might even be sending a subconscious message to the world: She’s with me, so back off! He may:
•Have his arm around you regularly
•Hold your hand
•Hug you at random times
•Always want to cuddle you
•Walk or sit very close to you
•“Accidentally” touch you
10. Be honest with him.
Focus on building an honest, open relationship with your boyfriend. Keeping secrets and hiding things can come between you. If you’re hiding something, he might eventually find out and lose trust in you. Always be open and honest with him.
11. Avoid picking fights with him. Arguments are part of a healthy relationship, but picking fights with him for no apparent reason doesn’t encourage a good relationship or show that you love him. As far as he knows, a fight could give you an excuse to leave him and meet someone else. Unfaithful partners also pick fights as a result of guilt. If you love only him, don’t give him a reason to think otherwise.
12. Let him know right away if something bothers you, and be direct about it. Letting things fester will only make matters worse, and he won’t know you’re upset unless you say something.
13. Speak calmly without raising your voice. Attack the issue on hand and not him. Give him a chance to speak and listen to what he has to say.
14. Admit when you’re wrong. This is a strong sign of honesty and loyalty. Everyone slips up, and you’re no exception. If you know you’ve hurt him, admit it and apologize. Afterward, don’t dwell on it or constantly revisit the subject with him.
Don’t completely abandon the issue, however; try to learn from your mistake so that you don’t repeat it in the future.
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